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Pleasant

need a laugh when rlc is dead #2

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A mom calls out to her son, "Harry! Wake up! You'll be late for school."

The son replies, "Mom, I don't want to go to school!

The teachers and students hate me! Give me one reason I should go!"

The mom shouts back, "You should go because you're the principal!!"

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Husband: Knocks the door at midnight.

Wife: Go back to where you came from!

Husband: Open the door or I will throw myself in the pool!

Wife: Go ahead and kill yourself, do you think I care?

So the husband stands near the dark part of the gate and waits for 2 minutes, takes a big stone and throws it in the pool.

!!!!..Scheweew..!!!!

Wife hears and opens the door and runs towards the swimming pool. The husband quickly sneaks into the house and locks the door.

Wife: Open the door or I will shout!!

Husband: Shout till all the neighbours wake up and come over here. Tell them where you are coming from by this time of the night with only panties and a bra!

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One day Mr.Smith, the president of a large corporation called his vice-president Dave into his office and said, "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off." Dave looked at Mr.Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I don't know who to fire."

The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to arrive in, so Dave said, "Barbara, ive got a problem. You see, ive got to lay you or Jack off and don't know what to do?"

Barbara replied, "You'd better jack off. I've got a headache."

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A student comes to a young professor's office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly. "I would do anything to pass this exam" she says. She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, and gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean" she whispers "I would do anything..." He returns her gaze "Anything?" "Anything". His voice softens "Anything?" "Anything" she repeats again. His voice turns to a whisper. "Would you ... study?"

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Mary comes home from her date with Ted and is on cloud nine. She happily tears off her clothes, tosses them all around the room jumps into bed and falls fast asleep. The next morning her mum comes in and wakes Mary up and says "How was your date last night?" "It was alright, I guess". "It must have been a lot better than that" says mum " Your panties are still stuck to the ceiling".

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